My Daughter’s Letter to the Parole Board

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To Whom it may Concern,

The word rape is probably nothing more than a word to many of you. It is only something I knew as only a crime before my family was forced to experience the pains this word actually brings. No person should have the nightmare my family has in our past. Most teenage girls remember their early teen years as those of bickering with their parents, trying to “find” themselves, and “rebelling” by wearing too much eyeliner; but those are not the memories I keep. I learned that I shelter myself from the pain of those years by hardly remember them, but what memories I do keep are not those I love to remember. I remember coming out of my room to my mother crying uncontrollably and being unable to help in any way. Imagine the person you love, hurting so badly, it hurts you, that is the reality I faced in my home. I remember feeling so alone. I remember the distance that came between my mom and me because I was too young to understand, sympathize, or help her in any way. My mom, who had always been my support, was not there for me the way she had been in the past. At the time I took that so personally, but looking back I see that all this was the result of one man. This one man, who I knew, has taken away so much more than what is recorded.  This man was in no way accidental in his actions. He had thought, planned, and executed his plan to RAPE innocent women. He did not care about these women,  their husbands, their children, or anyone else but himself. A man, who repetitively steals something so precious from multiple women, over multiple years, is not a man of concern, love, or remorse; it is a thief full of lust, greed, and manipulation. This was a man, plotting against women who were in his care, who had trusted him with very personal issues, who were extremely vulnerable to the game of the RAPIST.  Many do not think of what he did as a game, but as a matter of fact, that’s exactly what it was. These pawns were not willing participants in his sex game, they were women seeking the medical help of a “professional”. Knowing that a man my family trusted would do such a horrible thing, has caused me to fear the motives of respected men. A seventeen-year-old should not be so fearful of professional men and their motives. These men should be trustworthy, honorable, and respected; but in my eyes, they have become frightening. Men with such high titles have become, in my eyes, men who use their power to take advantage of women. This doctor was not a professional, a friend, or an honorable man.   I ask that you not grant this rapist parole. The hurt he inflicted to so many women and their families is outstanding, and to look past that is absolutely unacceptable. This man deserves to serve his full sentence on my mother’s case alone, but why should we ignore the other victims for this man’s freedom.  I ask that you think about the other victims, my mom, me, my father, my brothers, and my grandmother when making this decision. I ask that you think about if this were your mom, your daughter, your sister, or your friend. Would a man who hurt her so badly deserve the reward of parole? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

( I reread this letter to copy and paste to my blog and it still brings tears to my eyes to this day. My daughter has a beautiful soul and I am so proud of her I’m so many different ways. I Love you “Noney” ~ Mom )

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First Visit With The NP

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So I visited the ND ( Naturopathic Doctor ) a week ago. It was “different” for lack of better words. I wouldn’t say it was a bad experience. It was just different and new to me. I found it odd, I guess. But I am also very interested in this technique. I guess this would constitute a paradigm shift for me. It’s like my usual way of thinking about medical science is being replaced by alternative ways of healing. I am learning that healing the body is not only through an avenue of medicine. Rather I am learning that there are natural ways to heal through diet, exercise and healthier natural alternatives. I have learned that running to an MD is not always the best answer. Unfortunately, I have learned this quite a few times in my life experiences. So with this new way of looking at health and healing, I will share my experience of my first appointment with the ND.

The first thing I noticed about the office as I entered was that it was tidy and clean and nicely decorated, even down to having a neatly written inspirational quote on a large old-fashioned chalkboard as you entered the building. I guess I was expecting simple and boring. Instead, the building was quaint and welcoming. And to add to my surprise was that when I entered the building I saw an old friend sitting as the receptionist. A woman of faith that I dearly admire. I had no idea she worked there. That too was a pleasant surprise. So to begin the appointment it was the usual, sign here, sign there, fill in this section on the form, check this box, list of medications etc. then I was lead into the doctor’s room for the visit. The room I was lead into was an office style room vs an examining room. The far wall across from the door was stacked with books and a desk sat to the right surrounded by a few plush chairs.

First, the ND asked some questions about the type of symptoms I was experiencing. We spoke for a long time. I wish I could say we spoke about my health in general. However, the ND was quite a talker and he often trailed off to nothing in particular such as politics and religion. hahaha!! Good thing we had very similar ideas and beliefs!! I didn’t mind it too much. I relate to trailing off in conversations because I am quite a talker myself and often even scatterbrained. Nonetheless, I was paying for the visit and I was limited to an hour visit on my budget so I tried to redirect us every time we seemed to get off topic.

After some winded conversations between the ND and I, he pricked my finger with a needle and placed a sample of my blood onto a glass slide to review under a large microscope he had sitting on a table across the room. I got to watch as he examined my blood. The microscope was attached to a large screened monitor sitting beside the microscope. He began to examine my blood under the microscope explaining to me what the different components were that made up my blood. It looked nothing like what I expected under magnification!! As he zoomed in on my blood he pointed out the various “things” moving around in my bloodstream. First, I saw the blood cells. I was familiar with that part of my blood. He confirmed that in fact, I was looking at many blood cells as he explained to me the different components that made up my blood type. Then he pointed out all the fat cells swimming along beside the hundreds of blood cells and asked what I had eaten for lunch. I replied, “Mexican food.” and after seeing all those fat cells swimming along, I instantly regretted my choice of lunch that afternoon. After that, he pointed out the Candida that was in my blood. Candida is yeast. I had read that Candida overgrowth is especially common in people who have autoimmune diseases, so I wasn’t shocked to see that. But I certainly wasn’t happy about it.  He continued to search my blood for Lyme Spirochetes but didn’t seem to find any.  So he crushed my blood cells with light pressure. That is when we saw them. Two spirochetes swam out from blood cells. I can not even begin to explain the creepy feeling I got seeing that!! It’s almost as if I wanted to turn my skin inside out and bleach all of my insides!! Apparently, the Lyme Spirochetes can embed and hide in your cells and organs. That’s frightening!!

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After taking a look at my most recent lab results, my fresh blood and my compiling list of symptoms, my ND decided to start me on Samento. Samento is a natural extract that is derived from Cat’s Claw.  It is sometimes recommended to fight bacteria and inflammation in people with Lyme disease. It is also considered to be as powerful and sometimes even more powerful than antibiotic treatments used to combat Lyme disease.  I am 1 week into treatment and have been feeling awful. I have even come down with Strep throat and am now on antibiotics to combat that as well. Not sure if I am herxing or dealing with normal seasonal illness. I assume this is only a glimpse of the fight I have ahead of me. But I’m ready. With God’s help, I am ready to fight!!

To be continued………………….

Pride IN Justice

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I believe that forgiveness and justice are both important. However, there is an important difference between them.

Some would like to believe that he/she could remain neutral or silent when KNOWN abuse is taking place. However, I believe that silence in the face of injustice is complicity with the oppressor. Our silence means that we turn away from horrific things and allow them to proceed. It means that those who seek to dominate and bring harm to others can carry out their purposes unimpeded, in secret, in darkness, and in silence, and that no one will stop them. One of the things that I believe to be most deeply true is that silence in the face of abuse is complicity.

Let me give an example. If you are standing in your yard and hear your neighbor BEATING a child, you have a duty to respond. If by responding you are then involved in a case brought against the abuser, you have a responsibility to be a voice for that victim. I believe that morally we all have a voice and a duty to speak out against any known abuse. Especially for those who have been oppressed and silenced by fear.

A few years ago, I wrote into the Parole Board in opposition of my perpetrator’s early release. I prayed that all the letters sent in regards to his release would be thoroughly read and that the board would rule in my favor and that my perpetrator would serve his entire sentence. A board decision was reached in my favor and I praised God for answered prayer. I was viewed harshly by a few people because of my happiness at the parole board’s decision as a Christian. So I thought it would be important for me to explain my standpoint to not mislead anyone any further. I celebrate, not to slam my assailant, but to celebrate justice! I believe forgiveness is the absence of bitterness and revenge, not the absence of justice!! To overlook a CRIME basically suggests a willingness to condone it.

Just because I am a Christian does not mean I am a pacifist. God has many attributes. He is a God of Mercy, He is a God of Grace, He is Peace………… He is also a Just God, and a holy God, and a sovereign God. I am bothered when God or Christians are referred to one-sidedly and only labeled as “forgiving-pacifist”. Yes, I am a Christian. That does not mean I am a passive, complacent victim or that I would turn a blind eye to crimes. My desire is to offer hope to others, encourage victims to speak out against abuse and to encourage healing.

This is why I launched Pride In Justice. More on that to come…………………